Self Discovery, Self Worth and the Pursuit of Beauty

Attraction to beauty is based on our primal instinct for survival as species.

The above scientific claim may surprise you. As a bookworm, I found the statement delightfully enlightening but unjustly vindicating the males species whom I had long scorned for being the more shallow sex for choosing beauty over brains. Years ago a TV program (CBC) proclaimed that men were programmed by nature to select the most beautiful as their mates to ensure the propagation of the human race.

Then to make me really feel I was raised on another planet --- it claimed that females naturally are atracted to mates that can support the family. This was one moment of enlightenment for me! I no longer was so sure of my embrace of idealistic principles or my perception of being human.

No, I did not become an advocate of plastic surgery to successfully use modern science to mimic male fantasy. After all we women no longer yearn to be chosen for our abilities to mate. Not consciously anyway. - So why then work at being deemed beautiful?

If we remove the time sensitive values out of the scientists' argument, we can learn that our primal instinct for "beauty" is basically a preference for wellbeing.

So redefining beauty as the unveiling of our awareness and our uniqueness can reconnect us with our true nature. Therefore, contrary to our conditioning, it is ideal to look into a mirror and use the information found in your eyes, tongue and skin to tell you about your day to day health.

If your skin is dehydrated - you can maintain a youthful appearance by moisturizing your skin more more to keep up good circulation. But since dehydrated skin is signally the beginning of internal dehydration -- ensure internal health by increasing the consumption of hydrating foods like herbal teas, vegetables, and soups on such days.

If you still have a white coating on your tongue after the morning is long gone; it is telling you that your body is sluggish and need help with digestion and elimination. Spice up your next meal and forgo the sugary snacks along with other "Kapha Carbs". Pump up your exercise from a relaxing Yoga class to a high impact aerobics one. If the condition is chronic then your skin will scream at you by being dull and congested. While you can improve your appearance temporarily with good skincare, you really need to change diet and lifestyle to increase your internal fire or "Chi"

So as you see, a moderate regard for your external appearance is healthy and very advisable. Taking time daily to keep skin in good condition will not only help to keep skin attractive but also promote good circulation and body temperature control.

Where it can be a bit over the top when we become self critical and adopt a belief that our beauty is based on some one else's definition of beauty.

And extreme solutions are very poor substitutes for daily maintenance. They cheat us of our self discovery. Self love leads to true beauty which spirals back to feed our self confidence and so on and so forth - So goes the circle of growth and wellbeing.

Belated Valentine : Being Loving to Ourselves

Gotcha!

It's now three weeks since my last entry. This delayed blog entry is an indication of a blip in my time management resolution. This transition period where I have been mildly successful in not over working to complete what is on my to do list (Pitta) I have not been able make that list short enough to allow time for them or to say no to last minute diversions. (Vata).

When I am working with my clients I noticed most of my female clients instinctively help me even when they need to strain their muscles to do it. I use that moment as an opportunity to help them realize how they are always cognizant of the needs of others and their inability to just receive.

My male clients seem to have no problem just receiving even though they have heavier bodies and therefore there are times I strain myself to give them the same bodywork as my female clients.

So while the resolution to manage time in a more balanced manner and one to lose weight may seem unrelated, it may share a common desire to finally focus on us and our needs.

This Saturday Kristen and I along with a staff member, who is also a Holistic Nutritionist worked a conference for Holistic Nutritionists. Both Kristen + I probably were the best qualified to present the Holistic Health approach to beauty, but we were both there mainly because we both considered the needs of our staff before ourselves.

I observed that all the attendees were women. They all had the passionate to increase their knowledge to better help their clients but they share a struggle to create a career as they cared so much for their clients they were not fairly compensated for their valuable advice. Tahlia our staff member who also is a Holistic Nutritionist is able to practice her second profession with the help of another career in Esthetics. The other nutritionists were able to practice with the help of a supporting life partner.

These very dedicated women know their work is valuable as good nutrition is the best way to leading a disease free, healthy life. While client should appreciate the worth of their counsel, the Nutritionists need find a means to create this recognition and be fairly rewarded for the value of their guidance.

Can we all see how we can use this in our own life. A good start will be to sell ourselves first!

New Years Resolutions

Happy New Year!

I started the New Year with a resolution of organization and consistency. Since I have not written here since the end of last year, it looks like I have already broken this one quicker than any past New Year’s resolutions.

But don't be quick to judge. This resolution has a better chance of sticking and it has already changed my life in a profound way.

This is not my the first time "getting more organized" was my resolution. I have even bought books on how to organize my work to my home. Even a book enticingly named , "The Organized Executive" by Stephanie Winston.

From my experience at try to create more order in my life, I realize my problem was not that I was not an organized person or that I needed to learn more about how to organize myself. The problem was my desire to do too much resulting in over scheduling and being receptive to last minute changes and additions to that list.

Therefore to keep promises of positive change – whether it is about how we look or how we behave --can only occur with a clear understanding of ourselves and the real cause of the unwanted situation.

My workaholic lifestyle with its vicissitudes was creating excess Vata (for information on Yata and other Dosha types at http://our-metamorphosis.blogspot.com/2009/04/ayurvedic-doshas.html) and all my knowledge of anti-aging skincare was not hiding the extreme dehydration and fatigue that unbalanced my body’s systems and will lead to disease. Negative Vata tendencies in my thoughts and emotions were negatively affecting my cognitive abilities and my relationships.


So last fall when the Vata energies were in full force, I arranged to began the New Year at Dr Lad’s Ayurvedic Institute in New Mexico. I was looking forward to have the two week cleanse and rest help me create the needed balance in my daily life and to clear away the unwanted symptoms of my obsessive habits and indulgences. But it was up to me to rein in Vata's love of change and freedom with a more organized and predictable life.

Dr Lad and my personal Ayurvedic Counselor Suzana prescribed herbs and treatments that would balance my Doshas which in turn gave me the ability to realistically create a more structured life that was based on my individual needs and wellbeing.

I had planned to write my blog and to do some administrative planning during my two weeks of Panchkarma. Instead I let go of my over active mind and the counter-productive plan and spent the time contemplating with the guidance of Dr Lad and Suzana where I wanted to go in personal growth. I was given herbs to help reduce my Vata tendencies to be active and impulsive and to build back my energy and reduce symptoms of imbalance.

I finally develop a clear plan I knew I could follow. I did not just organize my work but included my daily routine for diet and exercise along with time out for a real personal life. My personal life had deteriorated to just dinners with my daughter and my partner. I was so addicted to my work, I could not easily plan extended time with them.

I have been back two weeks now. There has been no blog entry but not due to not staying on my plan. I had to postpone writing my blog to assume unexpected duties of bookkeeping. ----If there ever was a activity that could be considered the antithesis of Vata, it would be bookeeping.---

Since the resolution' main goal was to create organization and balance in my life, I had the difficult task of priortizing my work duties and not give up personal time to unexpected work demands. Good sign number 1 - I took up the duties of mundane but critical duties of bookkeeping -- Good sign number 2


So if you have a poor record of keeping New year's resolutions or any promises other time os the year, perhaps the problem is not your character but your understanding of yourself and the unique aspect of the unwanted predicament.

I find the popular resolutions to lose weight or joining a gym are also the most likely to be broken --- as early as February. Perhaps one needs to understand what activities one enjoys before palnning and committing. If you need help in keeping the promise of increasing physical activity, I recommend using Ayurveda to guide you in finding a health promoting activity that is more suited to your individual make up.

When it comes to weight loss, I recommend also recommend the help of Ayurveda to know yourself better before choosing one of the multiple ways to weight loss. The "one diet for everyone" do not take in account the underlying cause of the unwanted weight. I have known people who gain weight due to food allergies and others due to insulin resistance. Some people like Kaphas (for information on Kapha and other Dosha types at http://our-metamorphosis.blogspot.com/2009/04/ayurvedic-doshas.html) and diabetics have a slower metabolism. Depression and some prescription medicine can affect weight gain. I also do not recommend weight loss programs that ask us to buy precooked packaged food. Not only is this food the least nutritious but according to Ayurveda, Kaphas should not eat leftovers as they slowdown metabolism further.

We should not be discouraged when we encounter difficulty or fail to follow our new plan to the letter. Focus on the big picture - the overall plan - and the overall outcome not on the dailyups and downs.